02 July 2004 | 2:42 a.m.
A Night Like This
The Cure
I was in the car when a song came on the radio that made me start to cry. I haven�t heard the song in eons and it was an emotional blow. It took me back to my living room many years ago. Music can do that to me � remind me of moments past and bring all the feelings I was having that day right back.
I was in love once. I loved this man more than I thought was possible. I truly found a soul mate. We were going to get married and be happy for the rest of our lives. I woke up one morning and thought that something was wrong. I called him. He came over and I broke up. It made no sense at the time and I had no idea why I all of a sudden had to break up but I did. I broke my own heart that day. I still think of him fondly and wish him the best in his life. I still love him.
A few years after it was over I talked to him. He was happy. He had a calmness that he didn�t have before. He figured it out. He�s gay.
He would have married me. We were as close as two people could get. I loved him and let him go.
He is one of my soul mates. I think we all have many soul mates that serve a purpose in our lives. My best friend, Marlo, who I have never written about in here, is a definite soul mate. It�s hard to explain but everyone in my life serves a purpose and many of those people are my soul mates.
I�m not looking for someone to complete me. I think a person needs to make sure they get a sense of self (who they are, what they need/want, and how to fulfill their own needs/wants etc�) prior to having any sort of healthy relationship.
I�m looking for someone that I can wake up with and know he will be there for the rest of my life.
A man that makes me want to be a better person.